It only makes sense to remake yourself when you either really want it or you consider it necessary to acquire some of the traits of extroverts to build a successful career.
Learn to listen to your interlocutor. The path to successful communication lies through understanding others. Therefore, it is important to be careful when speaking. Try to understand the essence of the person’s story, take a closer look at his gestures and facial expressions. All this information will help you better understand your interlocutor.
Give reasons for your own point of view. It is not enough to listen and understand a person. It is necessary for him to know about your position. It can be difficult for an introvert to master the art of holding a conversation. Some of them doubt the value of their words for others, are embarrassed to start a conversation or, if necessary, interrupt a person. However, practice will help you overcome possible communication barriers.
Be in society more often. If you want to become a , you need to communicate more with other people. Adjust your schedule during your free time. If you used to spend your weekends in , now is the time to go out, attend cultural events and devote part of your leisure time to communicating with friends or acquaintances.
Remember your value to others. Surely you have important knowledge or useful skills that can help other people. Think about the fact that your expert opinion will definitely be useful to your colleague, and therefore do not express it. Once you realize your important place in the team, communicating with people will be much easier.
Apply the following trick: sometimes it is enough to just seem like someone, but not be one. You can remain an introvert at heart. May you have depth, thoughtfulness, the ability for impartial analysis and indifference to the values imposed by society. But be a good actor at the same time. Since people prefer outgoing, more outgoing members of society, and some rewarding professions require good communication skills, you just have to learn to adapt at the right time and demonstrate extroverted skills. This way you will maintain your own individuality and achieve your goals.
Try to find something interesting in those around you. Shift your gaze from your own inner world to people and life outside. You may like to study the personalities of your loved ones, friends and colleagues, and also think about the secrets and laws of society. And this is a significant step towards becoming an extrovert.
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- Introvert and extrovert
In psychology, there are two personality types - extroverted and introverted. The first is focused outward, on interaction with people. The second is fundamentally different: its activity is directed inward and focused on reflection and imagination. What kind of mysterious creature is this introvert?
An introvert feels most comfortable alone. He is prone to internal experiences and dreams. Outwardly, he may seem insecure and passive. In fact, he is characterized by deep thinking, and his activity manifests itself in intellectual inquiry rather than in action. Most often, prolonged communication with others turns into real stress for an introvert, so it is better for him to work alone. Such people make excellent writers, researchers, scientists, and travelers.
As a rule, an introvert is punctual and even pedantic. He is characterized by restraint, prudence and taciturnity. If an introvert feels that he has nothing to say, he will remain silent and not engage in conversation. An introvert doesn't like to waste time exchanging pleasantries and making small talk, so he may come across as rude. In communication, he values naturalness and honesty. This often turns out to be impossible, and adjusting to other people is extremely tiring for an introvert.
An introvert avoids demonstrative behavior, which is why he is often considered an introvert. But he has no fear of people. He needs a reason for contact. He does not seek communication for the sake of communication. An introvert doesn't make friends easily, but if he considers someone close to him, he becomes his most loyal ally. The introvert catches on new information on the fly. He loves to puzzle over complex problems and willingly shares his discoveries with a good friend.
An introvert is an individualist to the core. He does not strive to think and act like everyone else and makes decisions based on his own vision of the situation, and not generally accepted opinion. Because of this, others sometimes consider him strange. An introvert's idea of fun often doesn't match other people's. What seems boring to them brings pleasure and joy to an introvert. He does not need a rush of adrenaline and thrills. Being in the thick of things, an introvert most often withdraws into himself.
Strategy for dealing with an introvert
A person who does not understand an introvert readily attributes his behavior to a disgusting character, eccentricity and dislike for people. But you can't blame him for it. The most important thing is not to forget that introverts are not made, they are born. It is impossible to change an introvert, and there is no need to. When communicating with an introvert, you should not be intrusive with him or invite him to have a heart-to-heart conversation. You should show him interest and sympathy, ask questions, but without fanaticism. Often an introvert needs some time to formulate an answer, and silence on his part does not mean that he is avoiding the conversation.
An introvert is a vulnerable person. He acutely feels the misunderstanding and condemnation of others and can worry about this for a long time. He may not show it, but inside he is experiencing a real emotional storm that will leave an imprint on his soul for a long time. An introvert is easily put off by violation of his personal space and daily routine. You shouldn’t rush into him without warning or demand that he take off without prior preparation.
Find mutual language It can be difficult with an introvert, but it’s worth it, because he inner world incredibly rich, thoughts are interesting, and feelings are deep.
Are you the type of person who would rather sit in the corner of the room, hoping that no one will disturb you with their conversations? Maybe you're reluctant to go to social events because you'd rather stay home and focus on developing your hobby? If you want to take your socialization to the next level, you can train yourself to become more extroverted and enjoy being with other people.
Psychologists divide people by personality type into introverts and extroverts. The personality type is determined by the reactions that people show in certain life situations. The reaction that is typical for one person in a certain situation may differ from the reaction of another person in the way they interact with the outside world. Introverts try to stay away from society, while extroverts try to be the center of attention.
As a rule, an introvert or extrovert allows himself to relate to this type of personality, since this is an effective way of survival in specific situations. For example, if you're an introvert, you probably see certain benefits in being in less noisy crowds. You identify specific situations for yourself in which this personality trait allows you to be more effective in getting what you need or want from the situation.
What defines an introvert.
While you may have become an introvert in an attempt to protect yourself in specific situations, it is also known that there are certain traits and characteristics that are part of personality. When studying personality, one can notice clear boundaries between introverts and extroverts, so certain circumstances allow people to find their individuality in relation to social situations.
If you look at an introvert, you can expect specific answers from them. You may have told yourself things like, “I know myself,” or heard someone else say, “You have the freedom to follow your own path.” Generally, introverts are a less attractive personality type due to their level of socialization, which has not been developed according to the cultural standards that extroverts adhere to.
In addition to social and psychological differences, there are biological differences between introverts and extroverts. It has been shown that the nerve impulses and chemical reactions that occur in the brain of an introvert behave somewhat differently than those that occur in the brain of an extrovert. In particular, the brain's reticular activating system, where most stimuli originate, is less active in introverts. Also, signals from the anterior thalamus of an introvert's brain are sent to the frontal lobe with a slight delay.
Stimuli that affect an introvert's brain create stimuli in areas of the brain that are not typical for an extrovert and lead to more introverted qualities. For example, in the amygdala, where emotions are generated, stimuli are more intense in introverts in a social situation. For extroverts, the stimuli are more intense in the motor area, in which the stimuli of extroverts arise somewhat later, since the signals travel along other longer paths. At the same time, in social situations, introverts are stimulated long term memory, while extroverts have their short-term memory stimulated, allowing them to tap into motor skills faster and react to situations.
It can be said that the differences between introverts and extroverts lie only in the way the network of neurons is built, and the way the reaction to stimuli stimulates the energies in both types of people. An introvert's stimuli are directed inward, whereas an extrovert's stimuli are directed outward.
Is it worth changing?
The first thing to recognize is that an introvert, whose being is directed inward, is not so bad trait character. In fact, it was simply embedded in the human brain from childhood, programmed. Exploring yourself is acceptable and acceptable, at the same time, it should be kept in mind that the world we live in is an extroverted one. And in order to adapt to society, it is necessary to begin to expand social media.
It has been shown that the number of extroverts and introverts is in a ratio of three to one. Extroverts are those people who go out more often, find social networks, and develop themselves through the people they meet. And most likely extroverts are the cultural basis of our society. However, you can learn to change your approaches to join a culture based on extroversion while continuing to keep your true energy focused inward.
And you don't have to completely change your being from an introvert to an extrovert, but instead, you transform into a way that allows you to benefit from different aspects of life, which will help you achieve your goals and desires with greater ease. You can continue to be a thoughtful person and develop yourself, and at the same time you can find the freedom to create connections and explore other people and their abilities, developing the traits of an extroverted type of person.
Steps to extraversion.
One of the things to keep in mind when moving to an extroverted social identity is how you will achieve your goals, since achieving goals alone rarely leads to much success. It is also important to understand that this is done in a culture that is more accepting of extroversion. You don't have to lose your own identity as an introvert to use social identity, and you can always return to your roots of understanding yourself.
The first thing you must understand for yourself is whether you want to truly change. Think about the goals you can achieve by focusing your energy outward for a short amount of time. Remember that our society gets things done through social media. And just by showing signs of being an extrovert, you'll open up other opportunities for yourself, including the social networks you've developed.
You should also keep in mind that there are introverts who, by focusing on their goals for greater social belonging, have gained opportunities for greater success. For example, Joan Allen has repeatedly stated that she advocates for privacy more than social media. However, she remains an excellent actress, realizing that extroversion allows her to gain more opportunities than if she always kept within her personal space. Michael Jordon, Gwyneth Paltrow, Laura Bush, Bill Gates and even Steve Martin have all said that they are in fact introverts, but have prepared themselves to focus their energy outward to achieve what they want.
The first step you should take to become an extrovert is to find a social space that is most comfortable for you. For example, you might spend more time with friends with whom you are more open and enjoy spending time with. Perhaps you have a specific plan for climbing the career ladder that requires you to be a big extrovert. Starting from where you are already comfortable will be your first step towards transformation.
The next step is to move your energy outward. For example, if you are in a social situation, make one energetic attempt to be more receptive to the outside world, such as meeting a new person, or expanding the group of people you interact with, even if just for one evening. You don't need to change your entire personality; instead, you work on moving your energy outward in small increments to create social networks that can serve you.
Over time, you will be able to feel the direction of your energies changing. While you can maintain your true introverted nature of being, you can also learn to focus your energy into social activities that will allow you to achieve that. What do you want in a culture that is built on the basis of socialization. The rewards are simple: you'll have opportunities to expand your connections, gain new ideas, and even climb the career ladder. This will lead you to a more effective lifestyle, the ability to know not only yourself, but also other people.
If you are working towards specific goals or want to expand your capabilities, then the most effective way achieving goals will be a desire to understand oneself through social networks. You don't need to rewire your brain or find different ways to focus your energy. Instead, you can simply break out of the shell you're in to develop the skills and achieve the goals you've always dreamed of.
Barriers to extraversion:
Underestimating extraversion. Spending time alone is just as important as spending time with people. If you are a “deep” introvert, you may underestimate the positive role that other people can play in your life, you underestimate friendship, joy of communication and laughter. It is important to maintain a balance between loneliness and communication. You don't have to give up your activities as an introvert; you'll likely find even more satisfaction in those activities.
Undeveloped social skills. Social skills can be taught to you like any other skill set, just like riding a bike, you may not be good at it at first, but with time and practice you become a true virtuoso. One of the reasons why introverts try to avoid social activities is that they feel uncomfortable being in a large group of people, and primarily because they do not know what to do in situations that are unknown to them. It takes real communication skill to feel completely comfortable when starting a conversation with strangers. The more often you do this, the easier it becomes. Accept the fact that you just haven't learned it yet.
Wrong beliefs about extroverts. If you find that extroverts are petty and annoying, would you really want to be like them? Of course no. Many introverts have the wrong impression of extroverts from early childhood. Of course, such a vision does not and has not allowed you to become an extrovert. However, you don't have to choose such limiting beliefs about extroverts for yourself, you can freely form your own vision positive aspects characteristic of extroverts. And strive for their development.
Spending time with the wrong people. Would you want to spend more time with people you don't like? Of course not. If becoming an extrovert means you have to spend more time with the people you try to avoid, you won't have any motivation to do so. But even here you are free to choose such social groups, communication in which would bring you more pleasure. By becoming an extrovert, you can decide for yourself who you want to communicate with and when.
Reassessment of Internet communication. Online communication has its place in the lives of introverts, however, it is nothing compared to live communication when you can see, hear and feel the presence of other people. Often, voice and body language can communicate more than text, and emotional connections are made easier and faster when the person is in front of you. In life, you can get to know a person in a few months, but on the Internet, you can communicate with a person for years, but not know what he really is. And no, you don't have to completely stop online communication, just don't let it crowd out real meetings with people.
Perhaps it is very difficult to change your personality, and you yourself know, since you have already embarked on the path of self-development, how difficult it is. Sometimes it can be difficult to even change one habit. However, any introvert can become a greater extrovert than he was before; any introverted person can go “outside” and begin to communicate with other people and even enjoy it. Below are some tips to help you become an extrovert.
How to become an extrovert:
Don't avoid socializing, it will deprive you of many opportunities that you could get by socializing and meeting new people. And think not only about yourself, because there are many people in the world who could benefit from communication with you. Go for it, everything will work out for you!
Once upon a time there lived a man. Not too sociable. In the mornings, he was terrified at the mere thought of going into the office and talking to people. In the evenings, he wanted to be alone as soon as possible, so he rejected all offers from colleagues to have dinner together. And on weekends, when his friends were partying in noisy clubs, he sat at home and read books.
If you think this story is about you, then you are a real introvert. Do not worry. Are you okay. But you need to learn to live happily, not waste energy, and succeed in this noisy world where most people are obsessed with communication.
An introvert in a world of extroverts
Some people cannot live without communication and new experiences. For them, there is no worse punishment than being alone for a long time. They need constant external stimulation to feel energetic and alert. After a busy day at work, they would prefer to go to a fun, noisy party rather than spend the evening at home with a book in their hands. They make acquaintances easily, make decisions quickly and begin to act almost immediately. These are typical extroverts. And they are the majority in our world.
Today, many believe that only this model of behavior allows them to achieve success and recognition. Extroverted qualities are indeed very important in a variety of fields, such as business, where the emphasis is on teamwork, or sales. Generally, outgoing people are perceived as friendlier, more confident, and helpful. Sometimes it seems that in the modern world there is simply no place for introverts.
Does this mean there is something wrong with quiet, thoughtful, solitude-loving introverts? And should they break themselves in order to adapt to the demands of our crazy world? Of course not. If only extroverts inhabited the planet, we would not have Sir Isaac Newton's law of universal gravitation, Albert Einstein's theory of relativity, Fryderyk Chopin's nocturnes, George Orwell's 1984, Steven Spielberg's Schindler's List, Sergey Brin and Larry Page's Google, Harry Potter" by JK Rowling, "Sunflowers" by Vincent van Gogh.
It's time for all of us to get rid of our preconceptions about introversion.
Introversion should not be confused with shyness: extroverts sometimes also have this quality. A shy person is afraid of making a bad impression on others, but at the same time he may want to communicate more. An introvert simply gets tired and exhausted by excess external stimuli- vanity, noise, chatter.
The main difference between an extrovert and an introvert is what gives each of them strength and what takes it away. An introvert draws energy from himself. In order to be cheerful and balanced, he needs full access to his thoughts, feelings and sensations. And an extrovert is literally charged by the outside world. He is simply happy if there are a lot of people around and life is bustling all around.
Despite all the prejudices, introverts can be no less confident, friendly, curious and successful than extroverts. They just need a lot more peace, quiet and privacy.
Choose what suits you
Accept yourself for who you are. Stop feeling bad about turning down a dinner invitation in favor of reading a good book. If you like to dine at a restaurant all alone, feel free to do so. And, of course, there is nothing wrong with the fact that you prefer serious, meaningful conversations with your best friend to noisy parties.
Spend your free time the way you like, not the way you think you should do it. Stay home for New Year, if it makes you happy. Skip pointless meetings. Cross to the other side of the street to avoid idle chatter with random acquaintances.
For an introvert, like for any person, relationships are important, but you should look for quality, not quantity. A narrow circle of friends is enough to be happy. Cherish your loved ones, take care of them. Work with those colleagues whom you treat with sympathy and respect. Look for those you like among your new acquaintances. And don't force yourself to communicate with everyone else.
Try to find an interesting, inspiring job that uses your strengths: tenacity, deep thinking, concentration, insight and sensitivity. While extroverts tend to lead in the public sphere, introverts are most likely to succeed in theoretical and aesthetic activities. In many fields (such as the arts and sciences) it is impossible to achieve serious results without solitude.
The ideal option for an introvert is. But if you have to work in a team, think about how to minimize the noise and bustle that distracts you from important tasks. Maybe you will agree with your boss about a personal account and take on projects that do not require teamwork.
When to wear the extrovert mask
Much of our personality is determined by our genes, brain, nervous system. However, we are able to adapt to environment and to a certain extent expand the boundaries of your capabilities.
No introvert can become an extrovert. At the same time, almost everyone can learn to maintain small talk, speak in public, communicate with strangers, and behave calmly and naturally during meetings.
Some introverts manage to hide their true selves for years. Of course, you shouldn't do this. In many cases, it is better to stay in your comfort zone. However, sometimes circumstances force us to adapt to the world of extroverts. When there are no other options, you can pretend to be a little more active and sociable. But only for a while.
You don't have to wear an extrovert mask to live up to someone else's expectations. But you can wear it briefly for key personal projects - for work that you consider truly important, but also for the sake of people you love or anything that you value highly. The main thing is to apply this method within reasonable limits and not forget about your true needs.
If you're doing something out of character for a key personal project, don't suppress your character too hard or for too long. To avoid burnout, try to create “recuperation niches” in your Everyday life. This could be a place where you go to be yourself (say, a nearby park), or a period of time (say, a short break between business calls).
Make a deal with extroverts
It is not uncommon for introverts to marry or become friends with extroverts. In such a union, it can be difficult for people to understand each other’s needs: one person wants to have a party, and the second wants to spend time together; one dreams of getting out somewhere on the weekend, while the other is quite happy with a cozy sofa, favorite book and family board games.
There is no point in arguing whose holiday option is better. It's just that what works for an introvert can be tiring and boring for an extrovert. And vice versa. The only way to peacefully coexist is to enter into an agreement in which everyone gets what they need.
For example, you can agree to go out half of the time and stay at home half of the time. The agreement also applies when you come to your best friend for a bachelorette party, and she is sympathetic to your absence for three days before the wedding.
Be sure to discuss these rules with loved ones who are prone to extroversion in order to protect them and yourself from conflicts, absurd grievances and misunderstandings in the future.
Make an agreement with yourself
In some situations, it is useful to come to an agreement with yourself. For example, if you live alone but want to find someone close to you, you will have to force yourself to attend public events. It makes sense to decide in advance how often you can go out - once a week, month or quarter. Once the quota is met, you will have the right to stay at home without suffering from remorse.
Or, let’s say you dream of starting your own company and working from home. In this case, you need to spend some time establishing business relationships. Make the following agreement with yourself: once a week you will attend an event and make one useful acquaintance. On other days, you can relax and live as you wish.
How to raise an introverted child
If your child prefers solitude and his own fantasies to noisy games with peers, then you are definitely growing up an introvert. And, of course, you must help him cope with the rumbling outside world.
Do not try to fill all your child’s free time with some additional activities and do not force him to communicate with those who are unpleasant to him. He already has a hard time getting through the school day. Don't mind if he wants to retire to his room or leave the birthday party a little earlier than other children.
Explain to your introverted child why he feels stressed when he is in a noisy company for a long time. Let him know that his feelings are completely natural. Together, think about how often he should meet with friends and when is the best time to do so. Develop and discuss strategies to help you stay calm and energized throughout the day.
At school, introverts constantly find themselves in uncomfortable situations, so they cannot fully express their abilities. Treat this with understanding and start devoting more time to independent work at home. Or consider the possibility of transferring your child to family education.
In most cases, introverts have one or two serious hobbies (such as drawing, designing, or writing stories) that are not always shared by their peers. Praise your child for pursuing his hobbies, encourage him and help him find like-minded people. He will benefit from some participation in teamwork. However, this work should take place in small groups (two or three people).
Do everything possible so that the child acquires the necessary communication skills, learns to perceive new situations and new people more calmly, but otherwise let him remain himself and in no case try to rid him of introversion. Enjoy his original thinking. Be proud of his strength of consciousness and loyalty to his friends. And sincerely praise him when he succeeds in his favorite activities.
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Psychologists are terribly fond of dividing people into groups and types according to different criteria. A huge number of tests for every taste are freely available. If you wish, you can even find out “what kind of forest animal you are” or “what kind of hero from a fairy tale you are.” But one of these divisions of people - into extroverts and introverts - has haunted many for more than a hundred years. Especially often, scientists and ordinary people wonder whether it is possible to turn an extrovert into an introvert and vice versa.
Let's start with the definitions of psychologists
Disputes begin from the moment the essence of these two psychotypes is determined. Back at the beginning of the 20th century, grandfather Jung created and described the characters of people, dividing them into extroverts and introverts. An extrovert in his theory is a person who prefers social and practical aspects of life, operations with real external objects. An introvert is one who prefers to be, as it were, inside himself, in the world of imagination and reflection. Later, many other interpretations appeared, and, unfortunately, there is still not even a consensus on who these mysterious extroverts and introverts essentially are.
For example, some psychologists believe that extroverts are weak-willed people who are susceptible to outside influence, while introverts are strong-willed people who are not afraid to oppose themselves to the environment.
We love to divide the world into polarities and pieces, so as soon as these two types were born, those who wanted to re-educate them immediately formed. For a long time there is still no single answer. The psychological community is roughly divided into three camps.
And yet, is it possible to re-educate or not?
There are those who argue that a psychotype is some kind of innate characteristic of a person, a feature of the structure of his brain. Therefore, extroverts turn out to be more adapted to current living conditions, while introverts can be somehow adapted to these conditions, but not changed in any way. The main evidence is that outward or inward orientation is noticeable already in early childhood in people different upbringings and social status, as well as many studies on the ways in which two types of people perceive and process information. And if so, then there is no turning back. Belonging to one of the types is determined by nature itself, and you can only make life a little easier for people by adapting them to social life and correcting any deviations in the right direction.
The second camp, naturally, are fellow researchers who completely disagree that being an extrovert or an introvert is an almost life-changing characteristic. In their opinion, nothing is impossible for a person who is ready to work on himself. Of course, fundamental changes are not easy to implement, but over the years, supporters of this theory have accumulated a considerable number of examples when, in the process personal growth the person was literally born again.
The most progressive version is, as often happens, in the middle. Its essence is that in pure form There are very few extroverts and introverts. All people have qualities characteristic of both types; it’s just that, depending on the situation, some prevail over others. Only large statistics can show which predisposition predominates. So, for example, a person who is oriented inward can interact well with colleagues and subordinates, and for relaxation and recovery he will prefer to retire to a book or contemplate nature. Or the one who is called the soul of the party, an activist and an incredibly sociable person, in another manifestation turns out to be a deep philosopher.
Do you need to change anything?
It is important to note that a tendency towards introversion or extroversion does not mean at all that they need to be changed or remade, as if it were some kind of flaw. Each person has many strong and not so strong strengths. Psychological type is less of a sentence and more of a feature. After all, there aren’t a lot of discussions about how to transform a woman into a man and vice versa.
Perhaps the best answer to this long debate is that we are all unique and beautiful in our own way. And it’s great to remain yourself and accept your characteristics as a value and resource, which does not in the least interfere with endless improvement and changes for the better.
Who are extroverts
and introverts?
Carl Jung said that an absolute introvert or extrovert- potential patient in a psychiatric hospital. Healthy man has qualities of both types. A famous psychiatrist explained that introversion and extroversion are extreme points of the same energy continuum. People on the introverted end of the continuum generate energy within themselves, while those on the extroverted end draw energy from the outside world.
The main difference between an introvert and an extrovert is the low need for external stimuli. A large number of stimuli - communication, changes in places and events - are destructive for an introvert. Extroverts, on the contrary, need external impulses, and if there are few of them, they feel uncomfortable.
How to understand that you are an introvert?
At school, it is extroverts who most often raise their hand and make comments from their seats. and introverts often leave their thoughts behind the scenes. To schematically explain this behavior, we can imagine the introverted type of psyche in the form of a “thought-word” chain. The period between the appearance of a thought and its voice in an introvert can stretch for hours and even years. Extroverts, on the other hand, do not let their thoughts get lost in a series of thoughts and immediately voice them. For example, being in a large group of people, it is difficult for an introvert to analyze new information and at the same time draw his own conclusions. Introverts process information deeply, which is why extroverts often turn to them for advice.
Introverts love solitude and zealously protect their personal space. They are in no hurry to go to parties and feel guilty when they refuse to accept an invitation. Long-term communication exhausts an introvert and takes away his energy. In general, any anxiety or irritation depresses introverts many times more than extroverts. The latter are more upset by bad news from the outside world; internal experiences are the lot of an introvert.
Why is the world designed for extroverts?
Popular myth: introverts are shy and do not like to communicate. In fact, communication with people is an energy-consuming process, so in order not to get tired, introverts are forced to limit themselves in communication. Idle talk drains an introvert just as much as solitude drains an extrovert. Therefore, the distance at which introverts keep people is not a sign of arrogance. On the contrary, the ability to focus on one’s inner world, feelings and experiences allows introverts to better understand and empathize with others.
Another myth says that with enough effort, an introvert can become an extrovert. First, you need to understand that a world without introverts is a world without scientists, musicians, artists, poets, directors, doctors, mathematicians, writers and philosophers. Secondly, asking an introvert to become an extrovert is like asking him to change his race.
What to do at work?
The simplest thing an introvert can do is- warn the team about your introversion. To prevent your colleagues from annoying you with phone calls, you can ask them to write emails or leave warning signs (“Contact” or “Do not disturb”) on the desk or door and schedule office hours. “I’m an introvert” is a saving phrase when you need to disown a corporate party or an invitation to sit at a bar after a working day. For example, Douglas Conant, a famous American business coach, openly states at meetings: “If it seems to you that I am somewhere far away, please understand that I am an introvert, call out to me!” Honesty is conducive.
Open plan offices negatively impact many workers
In 2008, the scientific publication The Asia Pacific Journal of Health Management published a study by scientists from the Australian University of Queensland University of Technology, proving that working in such offices increases pressure, causes conflicts and can even lead to dismissal.
Some introverts come to the office and spend the entire day at the computer, focusing on work. However, communication is also part of any job, so you need to keep yourself in communication tone. Experts recommend that introverts set aside 45 minutes a day to “walk” around the office and informally communicate with other employees. When the desire to retire comes, it is always better to have your favorite playlist and headphones ready.
Since introverts remain silent in meetings, and managers and colleagues cannot read minds, the introvert's merits and talents may not be noticed, and ideas may not be appreciated. To earn professional authority, you need to talk about yourself. Not necessarily out loud. You can set up a prominent display for awards, or position yourself meaningfully on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn. If the world is made for extroverts, then social media is for introverts. Here you can quickly and efficiently build up a contact base. For example, before attending a forum or conference, you can choose a person with whom it would be useful to establish business contacts and write to him about your desire to meet him at the conference.
When it comes to business meetings, it’s better to set a time frame in advance: “I have two hours, then I’m busy.” If several noisy events are planned for the day, it is better to separate them with a half-hour break and spend it alone. If an introvert is engaged in extroverted activities on duty, he needs to organize a contrasting rear for himself and find an introverted hobby.
Open space or closed office?
Introverts are natural creators, innovators, thinkers and leaders. Susan Cain wrote about the power of introversion in her book “Introverts: How to Use Your Characteristics.” True, introverts reveal their natural abilities and talents only in the “right” conditions. For example, working in open-plan offices is a real tragedy for an introvert. The point is noise and constant movement, which paralyze the introvert and prevent him from doing basic work. Most people work in such offices today.
In 2011, psychologist Matthew Davis proved that open spaces are not suitable for everyone and in the case of introverts, reduce productivity, alertness, creativity and job satisfaction. The above-mentioned writer Susan Cain supported the psychologist and, together with the furniture manufacturing company Steelcase, developed a new type of workspace in which introverts feel comfortable working. The “Quiet Spaces” collection consists of five variants of closed work boxes, each with an area of up to 10 square meters. Soundproofing, frosted glass, sofas, different brightness of lighting, yoga mats allow an introvert to immerse himself in his inner world and return from it with fresh ideas.
Some experts argue that to make life easier for introverts, companies do not have to abandon open spaces and allocate an office to each employee. “Closed” spaces also have disadvantages. Firstly, employees spend more time on virtual correspondence and chats, whereas in open space it is possible to resolve any issue by exchanging a few phrases with colleagues. Secondly, the speed of information exchange in open spaces is higher - you don’t need to walk around the office and knock on colleagues’ doors, you just need to turn your head.
Opponents of closed workspaces insist that the office should have both open and closed areas, of different sizes and purposes. Then employees will change the environment during the day: get together to discuss ideas, or retire to think about them. This will improve the productivity of both extroverts and introverts.
How to behave in a large company and when meeting people?
In a new environment, introverts feel awkward and uncomfortable. That’s why it’s always better to meet new people for the first time on neutral territory: it’s easier to leave when you’re tired of communication. In case of severe discomfort and simply for prevention, it is better to take time-outs and leave, for example, under the pretext of “you need to call.” You should never be ashamed of your excitement; it is better to admit everything sincerely and with a smile.
Introverts find it difficult to maintain eye contact with the interlocutor - this seems to be a simple, but energy-consuming process. In order not to offend a person by lack of interest, it is better to sit not opposite him, but at a right angle or to the side. Then you can look away and not lose contact.
Extroverts came up with small talk - a conversation “about nothing”. Introverts don’t like this format of conversation, but you shouldn’t neglect it. For example, at a party or presentation you can join a small company. In this case, it is not necessary to join the conversation; it is enough to listen or pretend to listen. If possible, it is better to communicate while sitting: a “buffet” conversation while standing is tiring and causes a feeling of insecurity.
If you don’t feel like talking at all, but by chance the introvert finds yourself at a crowded event, you need to find something to do. For example, at a party or gala dinner, you can help the hosts by serving dishes or take pictures of guests. This helps relieve tension. Psychologists also advise seclusion at the slightest sign of fatigue and leaving parties and meetings without fear of offending someone.
The famous psychiatrist Carl Gustav Jung argued that you should not go against your nature, because this can negatively affect your life expectancy. It is important to realize that introversion is normal and even good. Therefore, the main advice for an introvert is: you don’t need to copy other people’s behavior patterns and try to remake yourself.
Books for an introvert:
“Introverts: how to use your personality traits”
Susan Kane
