In 1903, Nobel Prize laureate I. I. Mechnikov wrote in his book “Studies on Human Nature”: “Our old age is a disease that needs to be treated like any other.” However, most doctors and physiologists are against recognizing aging as a disease. They believe that aging is a normal physiological process, like embryonic development or puberty.
Corresponding Member of the Russian Academy of Sciences, Doctor of Biological Sciences, Head of the Laboratory of Genetics of Life Span and Aging of the Moscow Institute of Physics and Technology, Head of the Laboratory of Molecular Radiobiology and Gerontology of the Institute of Biology of the Komi Ural Branch of the Russian Academy of Sciences Alexey Aleksandrovich Moskalev told the correspondent of the magazine “SCIENCE First Hand” that aging is not so much a natural process, as many believe, but a disease that can and should (!) be treated. There are already mechanisms that can radically slow down the aging process and minimize the period of “helpless old age” in model animals, however, according to A. Moskalev, it is impossible to begin clinical trials of anti-aging drugs for humans due to the fact that aging is not officially recognized as a disease
Death before 150 years is a violent death.
I. I. Mechnikov
Everyone wants to live a long time and not grow old or get sick, but the reality is that living organisms age and die. However, living systems, unlike non-living ones, have an advantage. If a non-living system “gets old”, if something is broken in it, the breakdowns will accumulate until it completely falls apart. But living cells have repair mechanisms with which they can “repair” themselves, and can also be renewed using the reserve of stem cells: when at some point “repair” becomes “unprofitable,” the cells commit “suicide” - they go into apoptosis , and new mature cells are formed from reserve cells. What we call aging begins when the repair mechanisms inadvertently break down, when the maintenance mechanisms become damaged. homeostasis, constancy of the internal environment of the body.
Moskalev Alexey Alexandrovich– Corresponding Member of the Russian Academy of Sciences, Doctor of Biological Sciences, author of more than 80 scientific articles, books and popular lectures in the field of biology, genetics of aging and life expectancy, radiation genetics. Organizer of a regular international conference Genetics of aging and longevity. Consultant to international scientific foundations, pharmaceutical companies, expert of the Higher Attestation Commission of the Ministry of Education and Science of the Russian Federation and the European Research Commission
Human cells are not the most perfect when it comes to their ability to renew themselves. It is known that hydras (invertebrate coelenterates) have potential immortality, and American researchers have recently proven that numerous relatives of hydras - jellyfish, corals, sea anemones, and other primitive animals - ctenophores, sponges, lamellar and flatworms - have this feature. In these organisms, unlike humans, in adulthood, the unique ability of stem cells to regenerate any tissue of the body is retained, that is, the ability for self-rejuvenation of organs is high. Adult human stem cells are known to have very limited regenerative potential. There are also known plants in which the youth phase can last many decades or even centuries, although after reproduction they quickly age and die (bamboo, Puya Raimondi).
There are several theories of aging; According to one of them, the evolutionary genetic or mutation accumulation theory, aging is due to the fact that the pressure of natural selection weakens with age. Since in the wild animals rarely live to old age, because they die from predators, hunters, diseases, etc., they “try” to leave offspring as quickly as possible. But it follows from this that only those genes in which unfavorable mutations appear at an early age do not pass the strict selection sieve. Harmful mutations that appear in old age no longer experience serious evolutionary pressure, since most of the population simply does not live to see them.
Our colleague from California, prof. T.V. Tatarinova, having sequenced the genomes of the fossil remains of ancient people, found that they had a very high frequency of alleles of genes associated with age-related diseases. This may serve as indirect confirmation of the evolutionary genetic theory of aging: people at that time lived short, and accordingly they accumulated a greater number of mutations associated with age-related diseases, since they did not live to see them.
But now the opposite situation is also becoming relevant: as life expectancy increases, “harmful” alleles of older age gradually “leave” from the population, but, thanks to the development of medicine, mutations accumulate that appear in childhood. Perhaps in the future we will learn to diagnose alleles of both early and late manifesting mutations at the embryonic stage of development, and for each future person we will prepare a gene therapy program. Now, although we can edit the genome to the letter using CRISPR/Cas9, this system is not yet perfect. But we need to work in this direction
The less protected individuals of a species are from predators, hunger and disease, the earlier its individuals are forced to begin reproducing and the earlier old age sets in in their bodies due to the accumulation of mutations in ancestral forms with effects that manifest themselves at older ages. The opposite situation also occurs - species that begin reproduction late age slowly and live long. Depending on living conditions, life expectancy varies tenfold. The Greenland polar shark is recognized as the longest-living vertebrate animal; it lives 400 years, reaching maturity after 100! Deep sea groupers live up to 200 years. They live in safe conditions, they do not need early reproduction, so selection rejects mutations with a delayed effect. Or take two rodents of comparable size - a mouse and a naked mole rat. Unlike a mouse, which lives for a maximum of four years (and then only in separate laboratories), the lifespan of a naked mole rat can exceed thirty years, and it can leave offspring evenly throughout its life. The naked mole rat lives underground, where it is not threatened by predators or cold, while mice, which are actively hunted by owls and foxes, must leave offspring as quickly as possible. Again we see different effects on aging of selection for early or late reproduction.
Our colleagues at Duke University have shown that after just a few decades of stable economic and political conditions in Sweden, there was a small parallel shift in the life expectancy curve of the population. Surprisingly, not only the average, but also the maximum life expectancy of the population has increased, and this indicates a slowdown in aging. But these are very slow processes; To radically change the situation by evolutionary means, you need to live for thousands of years in such conditions as naked mole rats.
More than a dozen mechanisms of aging are known; Depending on the individual characteristics of a particular person and his genotype, some play a greater role, others a lesser one, although everyone makes their contribution. In a word, we all age, but in different ways: some develop mitochondrial pathologies and disorders of cellular respiration, others experience a “skew” towards chronic inflammation or insulin resistance, etc. As a result, age-dependent diseases develop - type 2 diabetes mellitus, diseases of the cardiovascular system, neurodegenerative diseases, and oncology. Thus, aging is a preclinical stage of age-related diseases. They are, in fact, late symptoms of the underlying disease - aging. In the early stages of development of most of these diseases, symptoms are often nonspecific, common with others age-related changes, and to fight them when they manifest themselves clinically is, as a rule, too late, expensive and ineffective. To combat aging we need, first of all, preventive measures, and the sooner you start using them, the more significant the result of extending the active period of life.
Medicine partly lives by 19th century paradigms. Stereotypes of combating diseases caused by pathogens - viruses, fungi, bacteria, where there is one causal factor - “spoiled” medicine for 150 years to come. Because there is always a temptation to apply this approach - to kill the enemy and thereby cure the disease - to all diseases. But, as we see, for example, this does not quite work with cancer, and with aging too: these are complex processes that are not associated with external factors, and with deviations in the mechanisms of self-regulation of the existence of a living system
Before translating any geroprotective therapy into clinical practice, you should first learn to determine according to which “scenario” aging will develop in a particular person, and for this it is necessary to develop objective biomarkers of aging - measurable parameters that change qualitatively, quantitatively and reproducibly with aging. Approaches are now being developed that propose using several dozen such biomarkers: choosing one indicator that would satisfy all the criteria for an objective assessment of the rate of aging is almost impossible, since aging is a complex problem; different organs, for example, the liver, brain or skin, age in one and the same person at different speeds.
Since there are several mechanisms of aging, there are also several targets that need to be “hit” in order to slow it down. It is necessary to act, on the one hand, on all targets, on the other hand, having determined with the help of biomarkers the most relevant for a particular person, first of all on them. This means that there will be no universal “pill for old age”; an individual approach to everyone is needed. In addition, not all targets can be “hit” with drugs; sometimes it will be necessary to use gene therapy, correct the structure of DNA, or act on the function of the protein product of a gene. At the same time, you will have to regularly monitor and diagnose all body systems in order to maintain homeostasis systems. The introduction of biomarkers of aging into everyday life is still a long way off; a person cannot come, for example, to Invitro and get tested to determine the rate of his aging. But working in this direction is important and necessary.
If we pose the problem correctly and look for methods to solve it, we will now be able to repair our body and mental functions, as precisely as a car. Today, at the experimental level, there is everything: biomarkers of aging, geroprotectors that prolong the life of model animals, even experimental gene therapy drugs. But to get this problem off the ground, we need a large international megaproject to radically slow down the aging process, like the construction of the Large Hadron Collider. Or at least a national program for the development of biomedical innovations for active longevity.
In order for there to be any progress, so that work to prolong youth is well funded, it is necessary that aging is officially recognized as a disease. Today, the international classification of diseases does not include such a disease, which means that scientists are not able to receive funding for anti-aging research, and pharmaceutical companies are not able to bring drugs to market to prevent aging. As practice has shown, some grant-giving foundations (I will not name them) cut off applications based on the word “aging”; anti-aging research is perceived as pseudo-scientific. The paradigm firmly sits in people’s minds that aging is a natural process, and why fight the law of nature? After all, it’s the same as inventing a perpetual motion machine. However, the practically ageless, long-lived species of animals, examples of which I gave, show that there is no such law of nature, but there is an accumulation of errors and breakdowns in the systems for maintaining homeostasis of the human body, which in the future it will theoretically be possible to put in order, like repairing an old car.
The problem persists not because the majority of scientists do poor work. Scientists are part of society, and if there is no social order, then there is no redistribution of finances in this area. Remember when AIDS patients staged demonstrations around the world, enormous resources were poured into the fight against the disease, and their quality of life improved greatly as a result. Now it is not a fatal disease, but a chronic disease with an acceptable quality of life. This is an example of the fact that in a short period of time, literally in a few years, with the investment of significant resources, with the understanding and support of society, great results can be achieved in solving even such serious problems as AIDS, which, unlike old age, affects only a few percent of the entire population .
If we live long, humanity will become wiser, more balanced and responsible both towards nature and towards ourselves. The human age is too short to see and evaluate the results of one’s rash actions and one’s ignorance. For example, politicians come to power, do something, but do not have time to see all the results of their actions, then the next ones come... If these people, in 50, in 100 years, could see the consequences of their actions, they would perhaps act differently disposed of their power
Unfortunately, both in our country and in others, there are forces that do not benefit from the recognition of aging as a disease - these are, in particular, pseudoscientific corporations, to which the struggle to prolong youth is completely left to them, companies that release unsubstantiated products to the market supposedly to combat aging . There is a huge market for anti-aging cosmetics and dietary supplements that are not medicines, therefore, they do not have an evidence base and do not undergo fundamental research or clinical trials. Nowadays such companies earn a lot of money simply by indicating on the packaging of their goods anti-age, if aging is recognized as a disease, they will be forced to undergo procedures similar to the FDA and prove that their cosmetic product or dietary supplement actually have an anti-aging effect. In the meantime, some are earning a lot of money, while others are guessing on the coffee grounds whether the next dietary supplement will help them or not.
There are also religious organizations that convince us that we must not interfere with God’s plan. And why fight aging if everyone is already destined for eternal life? In addition, people, especially the elderly, with a bunch of age-related diseases, and suffering from depression, often believe that the struggle to prolong life will only prolong their suffering. However, you need to understand that these problems - chronic pain, depression - are also associated with age-related changes and the fight against aging is the key to improving the quality of life of older people.
There is such a concept - “compression of morbidity”. Unfortunately, there is no analogue of this term in Russian; it means short period of morbidity- This is a phenomenon that is observed in hereditary centenarians, people who live 90 years or more in each generation. A study of the structure of their morbidity showed that they not only live longer than most, but also age-related diseases and, as a result, disability, come to them on average 20 years later. This is exactly what modern medicine needs to strive for: prevention of aging and timely complex therapy can push back old age in its current understanding as far as possible. If we don’t get sick for a long time, we will live an active, high-quality life for a long time.
We love to talk about overpopulation; it is believed that it is not beneficial for the state for people to live long. However, the US pension system is already “slipping” because 60% of the funds go to the treatment of age-related diseases, but this also turns out to be ineffective. We need to fight aging, and not just its symptoms, then we can take the burden off the pension system. If we now increase the retirement age to 65-70 years, it will be a crime, but if people are healthy, they will not only be able to work longer, they themselves will want to work, and will be happy that they can.
Readers ask me for more life examples, which is what I try to do. And even if I write an article on the topic of the next seminar, I try to give several practical examples for independent mastery.
But you probably noticed that most of the masters who conduct seminars do not reveal their secrets before the seminar. And even when some of them retell in their scientific words my theoretical research on energy psychology, published in print almost a dozen years ago, I welcome it.
For example, the replacement of negative thinking with positive thinking that I propose as the basis for the growth of spirituality is now called an increase in vibrations, which is the same thing, except that the cause is still more important than the effect, albeit a positive one. A positive thinking gives many other important consequences.
Unfortunately, no practical recommendations are given for raising vibrations. And this gives the impression that a person cannot do anything on his own, without the help of a teacher. At the same time, a person’s self-doubt is aggravated, i.e., in fact, his vibrations decrease. As a result, the teacher may have helped the dozens who attended the seminar to raise their vibrations. But thousands of readers will be downgraded and will think that they have done a good deed.
And yet: the more authors begin to talk about evolution as the goal of life, the closer this noble goal will be.
But, in turn, I would like to ask the readers a question: “Why are you so interested in other people’s lives? Isn’t it more useful to watch your own?” I think it's better to be happy when everything is good and grateful when it's bad. After all, it is in difficulties that we grow spiritually, and in rest we gain new strength to overcome them.
In this article, I wanted you to also reflect with me on this important topic, and not mindlessly swallow someone else’s mental food. Maybe at this very moment someone will think, wake up from everyday life and decide to radically change their life. It is then that it will become Life, when it begins to flow in a stormy, creative stream.
And when you read the title, I am sure that everyone chose one credo, with the majority choosing “struggle.” And this is not surprising, because that’s how we were taught. Now let's learn for ourselves.
But first, let’s read the scientific definition of life. This is "metabolism". And more recently, scientists who recognized the energetic nature of life gave an additional definition as “energy-information exchange.”
However, this applies only to the biological and mental life of a person. And sociologists give their definition of the life of society, state, civilization as the relationship between its members. It turns out that a person’s life is divided and depends on two factors: internal and external. And the external side of his life depends on the rules called “public morality”, and the internal side - “individual morality”.
Ethics is the science that studies morality and ethics. In other words, morality and morality are forms, and ethics are their content. To make it clearer, I will give one example.
Everyone knows the saying: “ A real man must do three things in his life: build a house, plant a tree and give birth to a son.” Just from the fact that men do not give birth, at least two conclusions can be drawn. That this saying applies to all people and that, like parables, it is allegorical and gives only one form, without revealing the content that people should think about for themselves.
I thought about it and got this answer. A home is a fortress, it is integrity, which can be provided by the ethics of family relationships, built on the respectful subordination of the younger to the elder (the law of hierarchy). The New Testament puts it this way: “The husband should listen to God, the wife to her husband, the children to their parents.” We see how the sin of disrespect for parents is now affecting today’s youth. It is rare to find happy couples who got married without parental blessing.
A tree is an individual morality that helps a person’s spiritual growth. Children are the fruits, the results of life activity, built on the morality of social relationships. Besides, a son is an extension of life.
In addition, these three things mean the three main values in life. A house means happiness, a tree means health, and a son means success.
Life is a struggle
Let's first figure out what gives us the call to constant struggle, and, in fact, to survival in constant difficulties and suffering. There is another understanding of life as movement, and this is precisely its purpose. But at the same time, the meaning of life is happiness. Will it be in constant tension? After all, we feel it only at rest.
Fighting most often presupposes the absence of rules, and even if they exist, they are immoral. Remember what we were taught: “The end justifies the means”? The majority still live this way, although a different formation has already arrived.
The purpose of morality as the rules of living according to conscience is to preserve and not destroy the state. And remember the “Moral Code of the Builder of Communism.” Of his 12 points, 4 demanded intransigence and intolerance. Is this not the reason why such a powerful-looking state collapsed?
Even positive morality is destructive if it is only declared but not implemented. Lies, manifested in discrepancies between words and deeds, corrode society with mistrust, killing relationships between its members. Stagnation in the economy is just a consequence, and the reason is the lack of morality and ethics in relationships. The first capitalists in Russia did not draw up any contracts. The word of honor was above all, and they prospered without drowning each other, and even giving “tithes” to charity. But now we have neither law nor morality, which is why politicians are so striving for a rule of law state. But this rule of law state is still based on violence.
“For every action there is a reaction”
This is Newton's 3rd Law, known to us from school. It’s a pity that at school they narrow it down to the level of technology and don’t expand it to relationships between people. Although I did not teach physics, I often showed its action in practice. “Hit the wall,” I say, “with your fist. Did you feel the wall hit you with the same force? Hit harder and she will hit you even harder. It’s the same between people, and not only physically and verbally, but even mentally.” But this was even before the discoveries of scientists about the influence of the power of thought.
In sociology, Newton's 3rd Law is observed as the principle of correspondence. If on the physical level it is absolutely clear to everyone that after compressing the spring, it will certainly straighten out, then on the social level many people believe that the injustices they commit will go unpunished. But the fact of the matter is that the opposite effect is inevitable.
The situation is exactly the same with the Law of Equilibrium: “If it increases in one, then it decreases in the other.” In social terms, it goes something like this: “If you take one, you lose another.” And a person does not notice that for the pleasures he so strives for, he subsequently pays with suffering. This Law in the East is also called the Law of Debt or Karma. And it also has the opposite effect: “if you give one thing, you get another.” For example, if you sacrifice material goods, you receive moral satisfaction in the form of joy, happiness and health. And vice versa - if you sacrifice attention, compassion, time, then you will not vegetate in poverty. Kindness is more valuable than material goods.
Law of Rhythm
Speaking about life, it is impossible not to pay attention to one of its basic laws - the Law of rhythm, which roots opposites in our consciousness, or, as it is now customary to say in esotericism, “duality”, and in exotericism - “dichotomy”. In other words, the habit of dividing everything into black and white, not leaving the right of life to the existence of its color scheme, but in fact, depriving a person of the right to happiness and enjoy life.
But now even exoteric sciences have recognized not only the biorhythms of the physical body, but also the emotional and mental. They have cycles of different lengths. Physical - 23 days (half of them are for decline in physical strength, half for recovery), emotional - 28 days and mental - 33 days. Accordingly, when a particular sinusoid is rising, a person feels good (not only in mood, but also in terms of creative success), but when it is falling, it is much worse, which confirms my theory of total energy potential (GEP). And the lower the OEP, the more acutely and sensitively a person experiences certain ebbs of energy.
That is why I constantly talk about self-improvement, first of all, as the accumulation of EEP. Our health, happiness and success - the main values of life - depend on it. And it’s not enough to know about it, you have to earn it all through physical, mental and mental labor. How? You can’t talk about this in one article. I have written an entire book on this topic, “Yoga of Life, or Psychomental Culture.” This is what I teach in my seminars.
Since our life is dual, in order to live fully, we must accept it as a whole, and not divide it into good and bad periods. Moreover, the “bad” periods we call turn out to be the most productive in our lives, and the “good” ones, if we get used to them, lead to stagnation. A person, like an electric machine, must periodically work, expending energy, and periodically rest to recharge. In this way, the integrity and fullness of life will be ensured, i.e. both of its periods will be beneficial, not harmful. To do this, you need to observe a sense of proportion so as not to stagnate in any of them.
Life is a game
According to esotericism, a person comes to Earth to fulfill his mission, i.e. play a certain role. Throughout his life, he plays many roles: everyday, official, not to mention artists who, not having time to leave one role, switch to another. And an ordinary person also often moves from one life role to another. Now he is a seller, now a buyer, now a driver, now a pedestrian, and each time he condemns and takes offense at other people in the opposite role, experiencing stress and losing his mental energy. Isn't this stupid?
Directors often encourage actors to live rather than play on stage, and such actors are called “actors from God.” At the same time, it is noticed that they live a short life, unlike those who play, burning too much energy and not having time to recover. In addition, they become so fixated on their role that they identify themselves with the personality of the hero. As a result, their fate is similar to the character, right up to the tragic ending.
Above we talked about the laws of life. Essentially, these are the rules of life. And if we consider life a game, then to be successful in it, you need to know the rules of the game. After all, in any game, ignorance of its rules dooms you to lose. Following the rules makes you be aware, and this is the most important thing in life. Awareness is the key to success. It eliminates nonsense by helping you prioritize by importance, and most importantly, constantly be in the present time.
Just now I was listening to Vaenga’s concert and laughing at one of her comic songs. I'll paraphrase it in my own words:
My husband is good to everyone and loves me, but there is one drawback - he does not close the tube with toothpaste. Well, how can you love and immediately crap at the same time? And I went to a neighbor. Although he has dentures, the tube is always closed.
It’s funny, but how many lives are broken because of such stupid little things, elevated to the rank of important.
Of course, this is not a reason, but a reason for a breakup. And the reason most often lies in the struggle for power, i.e. in selfishness leading to resentment. Resentment, in turn, leads from the present to the past, i.e. from reality into illusion. I have already written about one woman who complained about her husband, with whom she separated, as it later turned out, twenty years ago. And we commit a great many such stupid things in life, which can be avoided if we live consciously.
Life is a teacher
If we accept the esoteric hypothesis that a person comes to Earth to study as an axiom, then by carefully observing the events in one’s life, one can foresee impending problems. And not only avoid them, but also attract favorable situations. To do this, you need to observe the Law of Balance, which I have already spoken about. Those. do not create debts, but pay in advance. How? The work of self-improvement. When any problems, losses, illnesses begin, this is a clear sign of debt. This is the main reason. And it is useless to fight these consequences, which is what the majority does. The reasons need to be removed, otherwise the problems will get worse. They act as an alarm clock. And if we don't wake up, they start to bother us even more.
Therefore, thank the diseases, forgive the offenders. Love life as it is. Everything that is done is for the better!
Have you noticed how society reacts to information about large families who have built subsidized housing? People start writing angry comments. They accuse them of commercialism and dependency and pronounce out loud the most disgusting of all possible cliches: “to create poverty.” Anna Zlatkovskaya understands why Belarusians don’t like large families so much.
Belarusians cannot accept the fact that someone lives better than them. Judge for yourself. The spelling of the comments has been preserved:
- “The bulk of those with many children are people with poor education, from the periphery, who came to conquer Minsk, working at MAZ or MTZ. And everything would have been fine if not for the sea of benefits and their allocation to a special caste protected by the state.”
- “Well, I don’t believe that it’s not for the sake of square footage))) Living with my husband and two children in a one-room apartment, it’s not cramped and we decided on a third one not for the sake of meters - LIE... I would have believed it only when they wrote that they made money, built a four-room apartment, There seemed to be a lot of space, we always wanted a big family, etc.”
- “I never understood the “free” distribution of housing - for what merit?! “Beneficiary” is already a curse word. Must have salary which allows you to buy your own home on your own and without any benefits.”
- “Before having so many children, a person must think about how he will support them. Many do not even give birth to their first or second birth, precisely because they have nowhere to live. Why are these people worse? Or why are those better?”
Belarusians cannot accept the fact that someone lives better than them - now we mean meters, not children. However, many people can also envy children, otherwise IVF centers would not offer their services.
About this theme: Why do you instill in your children that they are geniuses? Knowledge of languages and ability to do mental math do not make them exceptionalThe preferential lending program in Belarus was developed at the end of the 2000s in order to improve demographic indicators. Few people decided to give birth to more than two children; the living conditions in most families were a “one-room apartment” with a loggia in a dull panel building built in the 70s. And here is an offer from the state: if you give birth to three, you get an apartment. It sounds like an advertisement for lottery tickets, but with a 100% winning guarantee. So, by 2010, the Kamennaya Gorka district appeared, where a huge number of large families settled.
There is also the other side of the coin. Have you ever noticed how much housing is available for rent in those very high-density areas? Where have large families gone if entire floors of apartments are rented out in just one entrance to the delight of students? How did people manage to get housing and why if they don’t live there?
“Once a mother of many children came to me and asked what else she was entitled to from the state, what benefits,” a notary friend shared. It seems that having an apartment is in itself an unrealistic happiness, but those with many children are entitled to other benefits. But before you blame them for this, answer your own question: will you voluntarily give up the “freebie”?” If the state has singled out large families into a certain subgroup of “lucky ones” for the sake of saving the nation, all that remains is to acknowledge this fact and stop grumbling.
I have two apartments, and they and their family live in a two-room apartment. With my mother-in-law and a lot of poison in my soul. Conversation with a mother of many children
It’s interesting what the mothers themselves, who were lucky enough to receive the coveted meters, think about the dissatisfied comments. A friend of mine agreed to tell me sincerely what she thinks about those who throw mud at people with many children on the Internet, immediately explaining: questions about the fact that she gave birth only for the sake of meters really got to her.
About this theme: Doula as a profession: “Lesbians, childfree and religious - everyone is equal before childbirth” “I was pregnant with my third child, and my childhood friend approached me. The first thing she said to me was: “Well, will they give you an apartment now?” I simply quipped in response: “And you’ll have to wait until your grandmother dies.” She didn't even ask who we were expecting, nor good wishes, just came and spat. How is that possible?”
Elena (let’s give her that name) is the mother of five children. She gave birth to four in a two-room apartment, the fifth child - already in the coveted “preferential” one. She points out that a large family was her and her husband’s dream. In her opinion, the birth of children has nothing to do with the cherished meters, and to think so is absurd. They say they managed to jump into the last carriage at divine prices, but many remained living in one-room apartments and saving for expansion, without hope of government subsidies. The opinion that children are neglected, go to any lengths and starve is absurd.
There are no alcoholics in the Kamennaya Gorka area, where Elena lives. Yes, and old people too. To build housing, you need funds, alcoholics a priori cannot have them, everything goes to the bottle.
When I asked what Elena thought about those who write angry comments under articles on the Internet about large families, she honestly answered: “In principle, I don’t care. In any case, I have two apartments, and they and their family live in a two-room apartment with a mother-in-law and a lot of poison in their souls.
Evil little people who most often do not want to do anything themselves, but at the same time cannot bear that someone lives better than them.”
Elena defends the position that all children born are loved and long-awaited. What does not know of a single family in which they gave birth for the sake of meters, and who will admit it? Advises people to take care of their lives, not to envy and achieve everything themselves.
They say that not a single Belarusian has refused state benefits for child care, paid sick leave and pensions. Why then should large families give up subsidized apartments?
Honestly, there was obvious logic in the words of the mother of five children. It is difficult to find a person in Belarus, or even on Earth, who would not pick up a hundred dollar bill from the asphalt. Yes, it’s a shame when you live with your husband, mother-in-law, dog and two children in a two-room apartment without the opportunity to buy a home, to know that families with many children rent out their “extra” square footage. After all, it’s difficult to predict how cool you will be in the next decades. And if you wait until your bank account is replenished with enough money to buy a large apartment, your reproductive function may simply stop working. And yet, in the benefits there is a certain deliberate disregard for the interests of some people in the name of others.
About this theme: The story of a child diagnosed with developmental delay, told by his mother So, once I sat for two hours in the clinic with my child to see a doctor. When our turn finally came, a mother appeared in the corridor, loudly declaring that she had many children. I skipped the line to the doctor with my two children. My son and I almost burst into tears out of resentment. I understand that she has three shops, it’s more difficult for her and all that, but why are the interests of my child being pushed aside in favor of the interests of her children, of whom there are simply more? A terrible post-apocalyptic picture presented itself, where large families are besieging institutions because they “are allowed to jump the queue,” and mothers and fathers with lonely, sad kids are quietly huddling along the walls.
What benefits, in addition to housing, are provided to large families from the state?
As soon as I asked this question, my interlocutor Elena laughed, putting a lot of emoticons in the dialogue window. “Payment for textbooks is 50%, such a benefit is ridiculous. Property tax relief. The discount on the single tax is as much as 20%. The most significant ones are 50% payment for kindergarten and assistance to school once a year. The allocated amount for three children is enough for approximately one school uniform. Oh yes! Free meals at school." And she emphasized that she didn’t even apply for the Order of Honorary Mother, but she could have.
And for a snack. When the children grow up, where will they live? I asked Elena a question that torments every normal parent. Answer: “No one brought us an apartment on a platter, neither did our parents. You have to achieve everything in life yourself, otherwise you won’t appreciate it. And this is the task of parents - to raise a full-fledged personality. But in principle, I’m unlikely to have any problems with this.
My mother will pass on the apartment to my eldest daughter, my mother-in-law has two apartments, my grandfather has a three-room apartment in the center and we have two.”
I seem to hear hundreds of sad Belarusians crying somewhere. And I’m beginning to understand why numerous families are subject to so many attacks online.
And yet, let's be honest: is it worth endlessly condemning and throwing mud at beneficiaries?
Children are loved and long-awaited, the nation is growing, and perhaps the children from the stone ghettos are future engineers and astronauts, scientists and writers. There are a large number of happy families, and let them be given these apartments as a guarantee that their heirs will grow up in a favorable environment. Where everyone has their own room and desk, their own bed and place to play. To avoid doing homework in the kitchen, eating in the kitchen, playing in the kitchen while others wait their turn. Don’t sleep on a folding bed near the radiator by the window, sisters on a bunk bed, mom and dad on the sofa. The slogan “in cramped conditions but not in offence”, alas, does not work. When giving birth to children in a small space, you need to understand what you are doing and what difficulties await you. It just seems that this in itself relates to the fact of being born in our country. It can be difficult, awkward, and sometimes even scary. But we all dream of a better life, and that's normal. Therefore, if one happy family there will be more in the state, then we need to be happy for them.
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I remember how I pumped my fists, but I did it more reflexively than consciously. The ringing in my ears was the only sound I could hear, although I could see the crowd in the front row around the ring was raging and I could feel my opponent's punches coming.
I was in a fight for the first and only time, and my reaction was as it should have been: I stepped back and began to fight. If I had accepted defeat and stopped, I would never have known whether I was a real fighter or just a wannabe, a warrior or a challenger.
We suffer pain and struggle as we move forward. Pain, struggle and failure tell us more about who we are and what we are capable of than times of peace. We are given the opportunity to become stronger by going through pain. Taking advantage of this favorable moment will either lead to our further development or contribute to our downfall.
If problems help us become stronger, why do we avoid them? Why do we look for ease when it is struggle that leads us to success?
Life is war
Every day we wake up in one of two versions of ourselves; Let's call one a warrior, and the second, aimed at external, material existence, resistance. Resistance is everything that makes us weak and timid.
Resistance is our fear, anxiety, self-doubt, lack of courage and imagination, and laziness. When we wake up, the resistance immediately begins its work. This is the part of us that wants to take a nap after the alarm goes off or watch TV. It's the voice in our heads that fears risk and wants us to stay in our comfort zone, avoiding growth.
Resistance can take the form of people in our lives who want us to remain as weak as they are. All this prevents us from going out into the world and creating something beautiful, preventing us from leaving behind a legacy. These people are afraid that they will lose us to the greatness that we have. They offer us pizza when we're on a diet, invite us to the movies when we have a project due the next day, and ridicule our audacious goals, dreams, and desires.
Resistance is the real enemy. An enemy that most of us ignore or support but don't fight. Most of us accept fear, laziness and the desire for an easy, petty life because the battle against resistance never ends. It is a lifelong war filled with daily battles in our minds and souls.
But we have an ally...
Within each of us - man, woman or child - there is a warrior. We have a source of inner courage that increases every time we defeat resistance in battle, but also weakens every time we are defeated.
The warrior feeds every time we take a risk, every time we wake up anxious, every time we strive for one more rep in the gym or spend one more hour at work. It grows every time we persist, every time we advance.
I defeated the resistance when I stood up after that crushing blow and continued to fight. I defeated resistance when I turned off my phone and worked, when resistance wanted me to be on Facebook, and I pushed it away, smothered that thought and did my job.
You killed the resistance when you booked that trip in the face of fear, when you started that project even though your significant other scoffed at the very idea, when you encouraged someone else to take action even though deep down you were jealous. You have crushed the resistance that wanted to crush your dream.
The meaning of life is accepting the struggle
Decades ago, Theodore Roosevelt encouraged fellow Americans to embrace a busy life. He urged to look for struggle and avoid ease. He saw that the essence of life, not just success, lies in a busy life, and that death and wasted time lie in easy life.
Indeed, to live a successful life filled with action, purpose and growth, we must embrace problems, pain and struggle. We must push ourselves beyond what we can currently achieve so we can achieve more.
To avoid struggle is to avoid life itself.
The next time you feel like you're giving in to weakness or forces that want to keep you worthless, don't give up, fight. This is reality and it is a matter of life and death.
If you struggle, you will be rewarded with strength and courage, you should live a great life, and if you avoid struggle, you choose the path that millions of people choose every day: a petty life of fear, insignificance and betrayal of the potential that we all have, in the benefit of the coward that too many later turn into.
