For a couple, sooner or later the issue of living together becomes relevant. This is a transition to a new level of relationship. And for it to pass safely, without disappointments and conflicts, you need to prepare for it. How to start living with a guy? Let's figure it out.
How to start living with a guy: what comes first?
You've been dating a guy for a long time. Relationships seem cloudless, full of love and romance. You start to build joint plans, which means your romance has reached a more serious level. There are no clear instructions on how to start living with a guy. But there are some recommendations that will help you avoid mistakes:
- Don't make decisions based on emotions. The issue of cohabitation must be carefully considered. Face reality. Now you meet only in the evenings, there is romance around you. But everyday life does not consist of only dates. Living together is the life of two adults with different habits. You have to get to know your partner from a completely different side. And you need to be prepared for this.
- If you have doubts, don't hide them. Possible problems needs to be discussed in advance. This may strengthen your desire to live together or make you realize that the decision is premature.
What mistakes should you avoid? You discussed the pros and cons and decided to live together. We must be prepared for the fact that there are many difficulties ahead:
- Now you need to learn to sacrifice yourself for the sake of your loved one. You may have to change your habits and your lifestyle. You and your boyfriend will need to adjust and adapt to each other.
- Try not to limit your partner's freedom. Do not forbid your man to communicate with friends, treat his surroundings with respect.
- Don't forget about your interests, live life to the fullest, do what you love. Don't immediately become a housewife.
- Don't idealize your young man, do not place too high demands on it. Remember that he is a simple man with his faults.
- Do not allow advisors into your family. Try to solve all problems together without involving third parties. No one but you two can sort out your conflicts. Outside interference can only make the situation worse.
Respect each other's opinions, don't argue. Heated arguments can leave a lasting mark on a relationship.
Svetlana RumyantsevaCohabitation, also known as cohabitation, is gaining popularity among residents of big cities every year. Living together without officially registering a relationship has its pros and cons. It can be considered as a rehearsal family life, gaining experience, testing feelings or the most convenient option for a relationship. Among couples in which both the man and the woman have already been spouses, civil marriage- This is a kind of symbol of calm. He becomes conscious choice two, familiar with the intricacies of family life. What about girls who decide to live with a guy for the first time? What to expect from a new experience, and what pitfalls will you encounter along the way? Let's share our experience.
Underwater rocks
The first months will be especially difficult: you get to know the person anew. Say goodbye to the idealized image and get ready to accept the person as he is, without romantic embellishments.
Flaws
Your boyfriend is not perfect. It is not difficult to guess this even before life together, but it will be possible to determine the scale of imperfection only in the conditions of merciless everyday life. Get ready for special difficulties if the young man previously lived with his mother. The guy spoiled in the family is used to everything in the house being done without his participation: a plate left on the table is washed by itself, socks scattered in the corners are washed by themselves, and food appears by itself.
Young people who have tasted the delights of living separately are more prepared for living together. Every bachelor knows how to serve himself at a primitive level. With a successful combination of circumstances, he reveals talents for cooking, cleaning and washing. At first, everyday little things will haunt you at every step: splashes of paste on the mirror, the floor in the hallway trampled by dirty shoes, crumbs in the kitchen, and maybe even in bed. Who's lucky! Do not despair. You can fight bad addictions, the main thing is not to confuse them with innate character traits.
Disadvantages can also be found in a guy’s habits. For example, a loud sneeze that sounds like thunder from an orchestra pit, causing the whole house to tremble along with you. Some voiceless men love to sing in the bathroom early in the morning, disturbing the sensitive sleep of their lady. Patience, you have a long time to work together.
Finance
In most cases, concerns arise from two nuances:
the girl earns more than the guy,
The guy's salary is higher than the girl's.
You need to choose a convenient budget option based on the ideas of both partners:
General budget - all money is put into one “pile”, expenses are discussed in advance. The wishes of both partners are taken into account. If a girl bought a handbag this month, then next month the guy will buy a console. No sexual privileges unless discussed in advance. For example, guys spend on cosmetical tools They have less money than girls, that’s their advantage. While the female representative is replenishing her supplies of lipstick, mascara and blush, the young man is saving money to buy a laptop. But here’s the problem: a girl can also dream of an expensive purchase, which she will not see in this situation. How to be? Explain to a man that cosmetics are essential items: they give him a beautiful appearance, he has the opportunity to enjoy his lovely partner.
Partially, the total budget is the amount for paying for the apartment and general household expenses. It is divided equally. The couple disposes of the remaining money at their own discretion.
One of the partners takes full responsibility for housing and household expenses. More often it turns out to be a man, but there are also business ladies who are ready. If a girl is financially dependent on her roommate, as a rule, she takes care of all the household chores.
Couples starting to live together have difficulty managing expenses. To solve this issue, calculate your budget. At first, keeping track of purchases will provide invaluable help and save you from unnecessary quarrels.
Responsibilities
There is one destructive stereotype in the minds of the vast majority of men: housekeeping is a purely female affair. This arrangement is justified only in one case: when all financial obligations lie with the guy. If both people work in a couple, then household chores are divided between two people.
In the very first weeks of their life together, girls commit one fatal mistake: they try to play the role of an ideal housewife. What is the danger?
You will not have enough strength to cope with the suddenly overwhelming responsibilities. Even an experienced housewife needs an assistant, what can we say about a girl taking her first steps in life together? Everyday life will exhaust you and squeeze out all your vital juices.
The guy will get used to it and sit on his neck. If you don’t teach a young man to help with housework right away, then it won’t be possible to do so later. He will get used to the position of “master” and will not want to part with it.
Traditionally, men are entrusted with taking out the trash, washing dishes, and the simple part of cleaning, but in each couple the division of responsibilities is individual. Some cohabitants actively practice complete equality: everyone cooks for themselves, cleans up after themselves, and washes their own things.
Personal space
At first, partners think that spending 24 hours a day together is a dream and true happiness. After a couple of days/weeks, young people realize that they cannot do it. The desire for solitude is a natural desire that must not only be respected, but also done everything to fulfill it. Let each partner choose their own territory for the rest period. It's good if these are different rooms. And if not? For some, a computer desk, for others, a sofa and TV. Hobbies are also a sphere of personal interests that should not be interfered with without a good reason. But don't go to extremes. Organize your time so that you can be together and relax separately.
Sex
Until a girl and a guy live together, sex in 90% of cases is planned. This especially affects female representatives. The realization that today the girl will be alone with the guy and spend a stormy night with him is a psychological prelude.
While living together, sex becomes spontaneous and at the same time obligatory. It is difficult for a girl to switch to an intimate mood after a working day and household duties. Sex loses its brightness. On especially difficult days (and there will be many of these in the first months), sexual intimacy can also cause a feeling of disgust. Guys are not immune to this situation either. In conditions of living together, the physiological characteristics of partners are also revealed: one wants sex every day, the other wants sex every three days.
Worldview
Each person is brought up and grows in individual conditions, has a subjective experience and a system of views on the world. Conflicts can be different: an atheist and a believer, a democrat and a monarchist, a Slavophile and a Westerner. But if global philosophical and political issues can be bypassed, then what to do with everyday problems? The girl is a vegetarian, and the guy is a meat eater. The situation is not simple. But even in it you will have to look for a compromise that will resolve the issue of cooking, smells and aesthetic tastes.
Prejudice
During their life together, young people will have to face personal prejudices and false ideas about civil marriage wandering among others.
Already married
Girls think that living together is forever. In a couple of months or years, the guy will propose, they will get married, have children and live together until old age. Alas, reality is different from dreams. and tend to disintegrate.
Still free
For a man, cohabitation is a ghost of freedom. You can always leave if something goes wrong.
Not serious
Civil marriage is considered to be. It's right. But cohabitation is an effective test that helps you accept correct solution. Young people realize whether they are ready for marriage and starting a family or not. This saves you from tragic mistakes common among hasty newlyweds.
He won't marry
This stereotype is based on the idea of a man as a lustful animal, hungry for sex. Yes, some guys derive one-sided benefits from cohabitation, but you shouldn’t judge all men by them.
Cradle of debauchery
Intimate relationships outside of marriage are still condemned among inveterate guardians of morality who grew up during the USSR. But young people do not share such ideas. Despite this, on a subconscious level, young people can feel shame and actively fight against the prejudices embedded by the older generation.
When solving difficulties, remember that it is impossible to change another person to suit you. But becoming a victim and putting an unbearable burden on your shoulders is also not worth it. The purpose of grinding is to make living together comfortable. Over time, you will adapt to new roles and conditions and find a common rhythm and common ground.
April 13, 2014, 11:23So, you are going to live together: your parents are exhausted, your friends are preparing heel jokes, and your girlfriends are starting to envy. Everything is wonderful, you have been waiting for this for a long time or you decided impulsively, but in any case you are filled with delight, since life together is a wonderful adventure, full of delightful emotions, that every girl craves. Why? And who wouldn’t like to finally have access to a territory where you can limitlessly expand all levels of your feminine perfection?! But life together will be like that for you exactly until you encounter the first discrepancy. Let's talk about them, their pros and cons.
You are together all the time
Pros: Now you don’t have to spend money on dates, think about where to spend time and constantly pack your things in the mornings or evenings after another great chill. Now you don’t have to worry about having a toothbrush and what his parents, roommates or pets will think. Now you can spend all your free time with each other, enjoying even the simplest and most banal activities, be aware of everything that is happening in each other’s lives and heads, and most importantly, never feel lonely.
Minuses: For many people, being in the company of even the most loved person in the world 24/7 can be problematic. At some point in time, the romantic fervor subsides, and in its place come your personal, emotional or physiological needs, which, alas, do not always decorate your life together, but on the contrary. If you still don’t have the same temperament, then the ground for a scandal is more than fertile. While one begins to miss bachelor life, the other wonders where the magic of love has gone.
Reality: Don't panic. Now you share space and time, which means you need to learn to understand each other’s feelings and needs so that life together does not become a nightmare in the first week. Everyone, even the craziest romantic, sometimes needs personal space, and this need cannot be ignored. Just because you don't spend every second of your precious days together doesn't mean you're not a couple or either of you wants to be with the other any less. It’s just that now your relationship has reached a new level. When you learn to be calm about the fact that your boyfriend is human, you will immediately feel better.
Sex non-stop
Pros: Living together makes sex much more accessible. You can love each other right in the morning, then again at breakfast, and after a few wonderful moments before work, an evening bubble bath and a romantic run before bed. Fairy tale. The point is that you are so happy and inspired that you yourself are sensual and high quality. Living together also gives you more time to explore each other's sexuality, which means you can improve with and with each other.
Minuses: Minuses constant sex? Don't even think about them. Why worry about what doesn't exist?!
Reality: But the reality is that no matter how much you love each other, and no matter how happy you are that you have finally moved in together, it may well happen that sex will no longer be the first, second and compote in your life. daily menu. Living together is wonderful, but routine, everyday life and the fact that you see each other every day affect the passion and sparkle. It may happen that you are not in the mood, or tiredness after a day of work is not the beginning of exciting foreplay, or you encounter other everyday problems that affect your sex life. There is no need to sound the alarm if sex begins to happen less often and is no longer as mind-blowing as before. Work on maintaining this part of your relationship, develop it, talk about what bothers you both, what you would like, how and when, and then look for compromises.
Household duties
Pros: You moved in together, which means now you have your own life. Together you decorate the living room, go grocery shopping, hone your culinary skills for each other, and rush home every day. In other words, you contribute something together to your common life. It has become much easier for you to show care, since the object of care is now always nearby.
Minuses: Despite the fact that it is pleasant to take care of each other, household responsibilities have been and will remain the bane of any life together. “Whose turn is it to take out the trash?”, “You didn’t wash the dishes again!”, “Where are the clean things?” and much more - in the heartbreaking drama "Joint Farming".
Reality: No matter how much we would like equality to reign in our home, it is the woman who has to take care of cleanliness, food and organization of life, regardless of whether she works or not. Disagreements over who does more to contribute to your economic happiness should not threaten your relationship, since these problems are trifles that arise from a feeling of injustice. Previously, you only thought about what to wear on a walk with your boyfriend, but now you have to smell his clothes to understand whether they should be categorized as “washed” or “still fit.” Learn to talk about what doesn't suit you, and also listen to what doesn't suit your partner. Living together is only a compromise, but in no case a sacrifice.
Appearance
Pros: Living with your boyfriend in the same apartment, you will understand that your intimacy has reached the level where you can finally be yourself, and this means not always waking up with impeccable makeup, sometimes wearing old pajamas or his shirt instead, being rumpled and tired, but don't worry about it. You can also allow yourself emotions and whims, because you are at home.
Minuses: The fact that each of you will soon be overcome by laziness will definitely affect your relationship, and the reproach “you stopped taking care of yourself” will not be long in coming. Or vice versa: you will be reproached for excessively striving to be ideal, and therefore worrying only about yourself.
Reality: Yes, you cannot be perfect every day, but this does not mean that you need to perceive your life together as the 15th year of an unsuccessful marriage, where partners no longer care about each other’s opinions and interests so much that there is personality degradation. The fact that your partner loves you anyway does not mean that you don’t need to take care of yourself. No one is pleased or excited by an old robe and dirty hair tied in a bun. Be great every day, even if you don't get enough sleep.
Our consultant, IAAP analyst, specialist at the Insight Center for Education and Family Development
Congratulations, you are starting to live with a new girl!
Of course, this time everything will be different: you will always be together and die on the same day. The only thing that can hinder you in this good undertaking is the romantic illusions that accompany the beginning of a life together. We have compiled a list of the most common and dangerous illusions for your couple so that they never separate you. Better let a stripper separate you!
How, how can you quarrel with this wonderful creature with silky hair and a voice that rings like a stream? Even if she thinks that way about you, believe me, it won't last long. All you have to do is wash your sneakers once with her shampoo, mail-ordered from New Zealand, and her eyes will become bloodshot. And we bet you won’t tolerate her habit of making fun of the size of your plasma in the presence of friends. In general, the bad news is that quarrels are inevitable. The good news is that arguing is good for your relationship. In general, the total absence of quarrels is the first sign of an impending breakup. After all, if you have nothing to find out, you are indifferent to each other. So fight. But wisely. “Think of quarrels as a kind of clearing of communications,” our consultant recommends. - Quarrels have the potential to bring people together, not alienate them. After all, during a quarrel you learn about each other new information" At the same time, you also need to be able to quarrel. Olga Mikulina recommends using so-called “I messages” in speech: using the pronoun “I” rather than the pronoun “you,” this way you inform your partner about your emotions.
For example, instead of shouting to a girl with feeling, “You cheated on me again with my favorite plumber, you cantankerous woman with an incomplete higher education!”, say: “I feel deceived and lonely when I am cheated on with a plumber.” “I-messages” will help you convey to the girl the very essence of your experiences. But suppressing and keeping silent about grievances in the name of the mythical commandment about the absence of quarrels in relationships can lead to deepening misunderstandings and subsequent rupture.
One of the main challenges that awaits you and your girlfriend on the bumpy road of life together is collective interior design. Bunpar's 15 Things to Discuss Before Moving In Says: "As much as you want your home to reflect your taste, you need to make sure your partner doesn't have allergies to certain furnishings." Agree like this:
- one thing of hers against one of yours. For example, your display of old cell phones against her collection of pink netsuke;
- develop a neutral interior that does not irritate either party;
- in the most extreme cases (reproduction of “Girl with Peaches” in a gold frame), introduce the right of veto. If you make compromises, then everyone.
In principle, according to Olga Mikulina, the idea is not bad: “Relationships are more stable if partners have some common cause. A dog or a cat could easily become such a common cause.” But before you run to the Pomeranian farm, think carefully. If you haven’t liked dogs since childhood and experience an inexplicable fear of cat whiskers, most likely nothing will change now. Perhaps, under the influence of feelings for a girl, you will even engage in self-deception, trying to convince yourself that cat whiskers are not scary, and dogs are pleasant. But a little time will pass - and now joint care of the animal will turn into a nightmare of nightly walks and the calvary of replacing the tray. And then mutual hatred is just a stone's throw away.
Of course, you can give her the password to your email, Facebook, Contact, Instagram and the forum for house of cards fans. But know: the next time you receive the message “I missed you and washed your socks,” you will have to prove for a long, long time that your mother is hiding under the nickname Svetka Sexy Baby.
Access to sacred information can corrupt even the most sensible person, and mutual trust very quickly turns into mutual surveillance. And now, under the cover of darkness, you are eagerly scrolling through your friend’s feed with a trembling hand, tormented by the question of why this half-naked jock with a powerful jaw gave your girlfriend as many as 14 likes this week. And last time - 17! So keep your details to yourself. And to the question “Why don’t you want to give me the password?” answer sincerely: “I trust you and hope for reciprocal trust.”
At the beginning of a relationship, the level of trust partners have in each other is off the charts. You want to tell her everything: from the time you ate a jar of jam in the army to the time you accidentally hacked your neighbor to death with an axe. Do not rush. Some information is best left to yourself, especially those related to past relationships. We hand over the keyboard to our specialist: “Some people talk about their previous relationships in order to revive the relationship and provoke their partner. The reaction to such frankness can be different, but, as a rule, it is either an immediate quarrel or a hidden resentment. The main danger that lurks in this kind of information is the erosion of the idyllic image of a partner. So protect your partners from your past. Remember: the only thing that matters is here and now. If the girl insists on the number, looking away, boldly answer: “Ten!” Researchers surveyed 1,000 users of the dating site www.SeekingArrangement.com before arriving at this universal figure. With her, you don't risk seeming like a loser or too lucky.
There is such a thing in relationships as “boundaries”. Our specialist told us about this. “In each couple, boundaries are set individually, but they are always there,” reports Olga Mikulina. - And it’s better to discuss them right away. For example, someone calmly pees in front of their partner, while another is embarrassed to even brush their teeth. I knew a couple in which the husband forbade his wife to hold knitting needles in his presence, because he considered needlework to be asexual.” Therefore, before you fart Vivaldi’s “Spring” to a girl as a sign of eternal love and devotion, by asking leading questions (“I wonder, has anyone tried to fart Vivaldi’s “Spring?”) try to find out her reaction to such a degree of intimacy.
One more thing. Incredible, but true: some women are offended by the sight of completely naked men, unless, of course, something like that is planned in the coming minutes. At least, this is the opinion expressed by the girls we interviewed. You have no idea how upset the fitness editor is! For many years he walked around naked and thought that everyone liked him.
The conflict between larks and owls is as eternal as the sun and the moon. And, alas, it cannot be settled. “Under no circumstances should any of the partners sacrifice their regime,” Olga Mikulina tells us authoritatively. - Remember that the other side of the victim is the aggressor. Night vigil can give rise to morning irritation and anger in the lark, which is unusual for this bird. Regular early rising of owls will lead to the same result.” So don't try to change your or your partner's routine. Yes, you may see each other less often due to different schedules. But the chances of getting bored of each other are greatly reduced.
At first it seems that this is indeed the case. You pay the bill at a restaurant, she gives you a tie; you buy popcorn at the cinema, she reads the credits to you for free the entire show because you forgot your glasses at the restaurant, etc. But suddenly you decide to move in together. And then it turns out that your views on the financial sphere of life differ.
Let's say she is convinced that a man should lie on the couch and watch cricket broadcasts around the clock, while a woman should bring money into the house. You, in turn, think that a woman is obliged to stay in spa salons for hours, enjoying exotic gingerbread wraps with the money earned by her man. Conflict is inevitable. Therefore, the authors of the book “15 Things to Discuss Before Moving in Together” argue that “financial issues should be discussed in advance so as not to end up in a situation that is unacceptable to you.”
There are many options for joint management of finances, for example:
- you can contribute a certain amount to the common pot every month;
- agree on the division of expenses: she pays the bills, and you buy whips with feathers.
If you still think that the topic of money is too slippery to discuss, then you either earn a lot (in this case, we envy you), or you deliberately live dependent on women (even more so, we envy you).
Before calling the movers, calculate in advance the volume of property acquired through backbreaking labor and the square meters of shared housing. The drum kit doesn't fit, aren't you Tommy Lee? It's worth putting it in storage. IN last years A brilliant American invention came to Russia - self-storage warehouses. For example, mobius-sklad.ru offers for a couple of thousand rubles a month to take care of things that can, by their very presence, poison the life together of even the most wonderful couple.
And one more thing: ideally, in a shared apartment, everyone should have a private corner. “For a man, such a place can be a table for tying fishing flies, for a woman - a dressing table with cosmetics,” Olga Mikulina instructs us. - External personal space is necessary, it is a continuation of the internal one. The classic male space is the garage. If such a place does not exist, partners will tend to look for it in other places, in particular in the apartments of other men and women.”
As a rule, this idea comes to the mind of the female half of the couple. As a result, in the hour that you spent in the sauna of a corporate sports club, you can receive the following text messages:
■ Mur-mur-mur :)
■ I sent you a photo of the kitten by email:)
■ Why don't you answer?
■ Ok, thanks for your attention.
■ Don't write to me anymore!
Agree in advance with the girl that you are not always available for communication. Say that, unfortunately, you have meetings from nine to one in the afternoon, and from three to six you smoke dolphins as part of team building. And, alas and ah, the management strictly ensures that no one is distracted by their phones at this time. But you will be glad to chat with her from half past three to fifteen to three. In theory, this should discipline her. Good luck.
But it’s always better to do this
Strain in sex
It’s only us, men, who think that it couldn’t be better to swoop in like a hurricane and grab your iPad within five minutes. And women, believe it or not, still love foreplay. And remind her often of what you like. There are two of you here.
Celebrate anniversaries
Try to celebrate at least such significant dates as the anniversary of the first sex in penguin costumes. Girls really respect surprise anniversaries. But in general, it’s not difficult for you to drink champagne one more time and order pizza.
Look good
Make sure she doesn't see your shirt bursting under the physical law of your mighty belly. And she, in turn, should not loom in front of you in shapewear.
In the early stages of a relationship, it’s easy to love the same things. You watch the same movies, wear the same plaid shirts, order the same cocktails and exclaim “Wow!” with the same intonation. But inevitably there comes a fateful moment when, after the nightly sentence “Well, shall we watch the series?” she's downloading an episode of Cougar Town while you were counting on American Horror Story. The illusion of unity is crumbling.
According to Wolinsky, this happens because when we enter into a relationship, we expect our partner to “merge with us into one whole, thereby saving us from loneliness.” So remember: it's okay to like different things. But in no case should we try to change each other, to make each other fit ourselves. Here's what Wolinsky writes about this: “Any attempt to change another to fit your idea of who they should be in order to cure you of the pain of loneliness is pretentious, narcissistic and, worst of all, separates you from your humanity and doesn’t allow you to be open and intimate.” The foreign tourist speaks well!
Even the most beloved creatures get boring sooner or later (if you have a child, you will understand what we mean). Therefore, there is nothing shameful (what a funny word, by the way) to periodically take a break from contemplating each other. Here is what our specialist told us about this: “For some couples, especially those who not only live but also work together, it is better to go on vacation separately. Some people fear their partner will cheat while away from home. If a person is determined to commit treason, he will commit it on the street next to his house. Distances are not important."
Living together can easily turn your relationship into hell! Or vice versa – take them to a new level. After living with you for a couple of months, MCH can seriously talk about marriage. Or vice versa - understand that in everyday life you are incompatible.
To successfully pass the test of life together, the main thing is not to force things. You need to move in together when you are really ready for it. Then you both will enjoy living under the same roof. However, how do you know if your relationship has matured to such an important step?
WomanJournal.ru invites you to check our list. If at least 5 signs match, it means that most likely you and your boyfriend will get along well together. And your couple can safely look for an apartment to live together. So, check your readiness!
- Your dream man saw you without makeup/with a hangover/with a cold, etc., but his feelings did not cool down because of this. If, waking up with you in the morning, he happily hugs and kisses you, calls you “his most beautiful girl,” etc. - it means he really loves you for who you are, even without hair styling and makeup! This is a good sign!
- He says that he would like to see you more often and tries to spend every free minute with you. Yes, and you would like to spend as much time as possible with your loved one.
- You have more than once jokingly discussed the prospect of living together and have already decided who will cook and who will take out the trash. If this conversation hasn't happened yet, have one. Even if you jokingly try to discuss the terms of your life together, you will immediately understand whether your views on household responsibilities, earnings, everyday life, etc. coincide. If not, then it is better to resolve differences and find compromises now, before you start living together.
- You like to spend time together and are never bored when alone with each other. Many couples survive only through constant joint entertainment: restaurants, cinema, clubs, companies. And left alone with each other in the apartment, they realize that they have nothing to talk about. Make sure this isn't about you!
- You know the shortcomings of your MCH, but you are quite ready to ignore them. It's worth moving in together only when you accept your loved one for who he is. If, when you move in together, you hope to change it, then your life together will turn into an eternal war.
- The prospect of life together inspires you! You're dreaming about how you'll cook a romantic dinner by candlelight or take a bubble bath together. If you associate life together with a mountain of unwashed dishes, boring routine sex and a faded robe, it’s clear you haven’t matured yet.
- You have already discussed and decided the financial issue for yourself. Who will make money? Who pays the rent? On whose income will you go on vacation? How much will each of you contribute to the overall budget? If you have already discussed the topic of money and come to an agreement, then your love boat is not afraid of the rocks of everyday life.
- MCH has already proposed to you, but you decided to test the relationship by living together. Quite reasonable!
- You have suitable living space. It is advisable, of course, to live together. But if this is not possible, and you live with relatives, then at least live in an apartment where there are fewer problems! Think about it, do you want to live not only with MCH, but also with his mother, grandmother, dog and bitch sister? If not, don’t rush to move in!
- MCH suggested living together, and you were overjoyed and without hesitation, you said “yes”! This is the most sure sign your readiness. It sounds like you want this with all your heart and your mind can't control your feelings. Great! Move in! And may your feelings only grow stronger, and may your romance move towards a happy wedding ending!
Here are the reasons why you shouldn’t move in together:
- All your friends moved in with their boyfriends, and you decided that it was time for you too.
- Your relationship leaves much to be desired, and you hope to improve it by living together.
- You are tired of living with your parents and want to move away from them at any cost.
- You just like your MCH’s apartment. And much stronger than the MCH himself!
